Pickled Beets and Cottage Cheese.
Tastes really, really, really good. And it's healthy to boot. Beats popcorn with extra butter, or salt and vinegar potato chips (my snack of choice three times yesterday). I'm not an "unhealthy" eater per say, I'm just a little mood driven when it comes to food, pregnant or not. It's a good thing I'm the head chef of this household.
A month ago I was struggling to think of any food I thought would be tasty. This month the second trimester is coming on and probably the bulk of my weight gain. Now, I have all I can do to think of a food I don't want to eat. I've been begging the Gods of Pregnant Ladies Appetites to spare me the 60 lbs. that I gained in the first pregnancy. I just don't think my body will be able to recouperate as nicely as it did when I was 24. Even then it took me a VERY long time to shed the last 20 lbs of weight. I know 30 isn't exactly nursing home age; I just hear a lot of women talk about their size and the maintaining of it after 30 and it's not always a positive conversation.
So yes, I'm afraid. More afraid of the weight gain than I am of the juggling that will occur after the birth, or the fear of uterine rupture should I choose to have a VBAC, or the fear of actually succeeding at a VBAC, or the fear of NOT succeeding at the VBAC. Ok, I lied. VBAC is pretty much a big scary acronym that I'm seeing in my nightmares regularly. I guess I'm just down right scared and there aren't many people, well there aren't ANY people in my life that want to listen to my obsession of any of the above topics. Not for another 7 months anyway. A conversation here and there, maybe. But certainly not the main topic for the duration of the gestation period.
I tend to be a one track mind until resolution kind of thinker. If something is bothering me, or worrying me, I have a very hard time thinking, or doing much else. That seems a little on the mentally sick side, but it's true. I really have a very hard time getting past something without lengthy discussions followed by irrational thinking reversals performed by the husband. He's gotten increasingly good at this over the years and never ceases to make me laugh at myself without feeling hurt by his comments. It's an art he's refined over the years that we've been together. Kinda like my ability to argue without raising my voice in the slightest just so I can say "hey, you don't have to yell". Makes me feel more grown up.
I think I'm going crazy. This post now has nothing to do with it's title. I need more therapy.
2 comments:
*raising hand* over here! me too! another 60 lb gainer right here! It will come off, just not as easily as the first go 'round. I'm still ten lbs away from my pre-preggo weight. Of course it would shed itself sooner rather than later if I'd keep my face out of the freaking cheetos.
As for your fears, I totally sympathize. I fretted for months about going under the knife until I worked myself up into a sheer state of panic on the operating table. My husband said I sounded like a dying cow. Had my hands not been strapped down I might have socked him in the eye for that one. Whichever way you choose to bring your baby into the world, it will happen successfully and you will recover quickly. The first few weeks postpartum pass in such a blur that you're healed before you realize it.
Check out message boards about VBAC's and 2nd time c-sects, you'll find lots of advice and comforting success stories.
:)
I lOVE this pickeled beets and cottage cheese thing. Discovered last night, when suddenly it dawned on me how delicious the thought sounded. Sure enough, was delicious!! I too gained 60 the first time, 40 the 2nd time, and now I am 5 mnths along with my 3rd child and trying to make it 25 lbs or less. Seriously. I am going to make my best effort to do a paleo/weight watchers type diet with a couple exceptions to the rule. Putting it this way, no grains MOST of the time, no refined sugars MOST of the time, trying to substitute any of the normal carby cravings with fruit, veges, and yummy soup (pacific foods butternut squash or carrot ginger cashew) with salt and sour cream. Light in calories, filling, healthy, and delicious, warm to boot for the winter. I definitely do not intend to diet, and I plan to not deny myself the things I really really want to have, let alone the things I need for a healthy pregnancy, but I do intend to control the overeating. I am already kind of big and I just absolutely do not want to get any bigger than I am going to anyway. Trust me though, I am making it sound easier than it actually is right now. Currently, I WANT a McChicken and a bowl of lucky charms. Only time will tell if I make it through the day without either of these things. Hey, I said I was TRYING to be good. I'll let you know how it goes.
Yeah, I know how you feel about being an obsessive worry wort. I am so the same way. can't do anything else until I get resolution or reassurance. Impossible. I am crazy too. Here's the thing, I don't know when you posted your blog here, so maybe you have already had your bby, buuuuut... the way see it? I thought the planned C-Sctn was a blessing! I am SO afraid of the gyno. I have had many a nightmare of myself in the stirrups and being examined. To me there is really nothing worse. The biggest most frightening thing to me is to have my stuff wide open and exposed to the entire hospital staff for hours and hours of uncomfortable labor, only for them to tell me in the end that I am going to need a C-Sctn anyway. A C-Sctn is actually less stress for the baby and your body if it is needed, in a lot of cases, that is why the doctors do it so much these days. Not to mention, If you get a C-Sctn, you can do your hair, nails, makeup and be gorgeous for the after-delivery visitors and photos. All my pics were relatively pretty after both my kids delivered (my first child was breech and they could not turn her around, so I just went with it - yeah it was a little scary, but honestly a vag delivery scared me far worse; when I was able to let it go and accept the situation, I was happy as a clam), happily said. My grandma walked in and hilariously exclaimed "MY GOD, You look like you are on General Hospital or something, honey!" V-back? I hate to say it, but so many women out there try for it and then end up getting a c-section anyway - double the stress on your baby, your body and your head and absolutely not fun in any regard, plus some really bad photos of you in the end :(. Ha!! Nooo, I am not really that vein... just quirky... and my mother in law tends to take the WORST photos of me she possibly can, then shares them in mass mailings to friends and family - I try to prevent this whenever possible. Please don't take me wrong, I am just sharing my thoughts, but hey to each her own... but if I was your gal pal, I would just say "go with the c-section. Less stress for all, plan the kid's birthday on the day you want it, make it on a day that works well with your family's schedule, get all prettied up and go with it, girl!" Either way you choose, though, it is your comfort zone however you choose to do it, but I hope/am sure you recover well, everything goes well, and I hope you have a beautiful little baby to boot! Just try not to worry about it. Enjoy your pregnancy and chill out with a yummy virgin cocktail. Do your best to feel and look fabulous and you'll feel good no matter how much you gain. Good luck, honey!: )
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