Hubby said.....

you didn't tell me that you were having naughty dreams about me. See hon, thing is, that the only time I've been feeling good while you're around is the middle of the night while I'm sleeping. That isn't all that condusive to great sex because I'm already getting it in my dream and don't feel the need to wake up and find out I'm not having sex. Besides......I'm a heavy sleeper. You're the one who does the waking in the middle of the night.....remember??


On a side note, I just have to mention that I actually feel so good that I've been house cleaning. I don't know how long this will last and I may only get through the kitchen and floors but I am just oh so excited to think that the morning sickness phase is coming to a close. Or at least I hope so. I even went for a brisk walk this morning after the kiddies got onto the bus. It was only a mile....but a MILE IS A MILE. I think the fresh air did me some good and that is what kick started the trash taking out and the house cleaning. Hey, right about now, I'll take any energy burst I seem to muster. I hope I'm not turning into a lazy oaf. That's exactly how I've been feeling for nearly three weeks.

I'm 8 weeks prego now. Only 32 more weeks to go.....unless I do scheduled c-section. Maybe if the baby is mature enough they'll take the little one sooner....maybe at 38 or 39 weeks perhaps. If I complain of discomfort and anguish for the four weeks prior, then maybe. As long as the baby is okay to come out. It's all for the baby after all and my body is just a host and I'll gladly do my job. Well, okay, I'll be honest.....not gladly 100% of the time.

Last night the hubby also said he's jealous I get to be pregnant and have special treatment. I told him I'd gladly trade places. He decided he likes beer more. All I have to say is this.......MOST days I'm devoted to the spoiling and doting of this fortunate family and dammit I'm taking my 40 weeks and that's all there is to it. When it's all over I'll be back to the grind plus baby on hip. I deserve it and he'll be some lucky if I don't milk every last drop and then some.

I love you honey. We're best friends, right?

A Reprieve....

I'm not sure what to do with myself this morning since I woke up feeling mildly normal. The all the time sickness has really been getting me down lately and the few minutes I do get a break from it I hardly know what I should engage in.

Food is seen in a totally new light right now. The aversions are tiring. There is no way I can even try to cook meat. Nutritious meals are now put completely on hold. I feel so bad for the hubby, he's had to fend for himself for a couple of weeks and is lucky if I manage one meal a week right now. Truth is, I just can't do it right now. I don't want to neglect his needs but this is what it is right now. I do my best to get S something resembling healthy and nutritious. Then I take on the chore of figuring out what I can/want/will eat without laying me out for the night. Last night it was macaroni with canned tomatoes, butter, salt and pepper. The day before that...potato puffs that I didn't eat and a grilled cheese.....the day before that was a can of spinach. My eating habits are sporadic and strange to say the least and although most choices are healthy they just haven't satisfied my brain with the normal meals I'm accustomed to creating and consuming. Green peppers will have to go for now. I can't even eat a sliver without getting horrible indegestion and indescribable gas pains. It sucks.

Anyway, this is what I'm doing. My entire day consists of trying to feed myself and trying to feel better and trying not to get upset at the kids after school when all they want to do is play. Atop all the sickness I came down with a bad cold which is making me miserable and tired as well.

My dreams are startling. The other night, it was the end of days....literally the end of the world as we know it. Where was I? At my Mother in Law's house and she was STILL bossing me around and shoving her opinion in places it need not be. Go figure.......and last night. I went to spring break with a bunch of people I do not know. I knew them in the dream.....but have absolutely NO idea who those people were. Not even a little bit. I went down one huge ass waterslide, after that we had to avoid being abducted by strange alien type people. That was a little strange too. There are more but they escape me right now. Too funny.....I could make tv.

Holy Mary Mother of God.......talk about reality tv.......televising pregnant women's dreams as they are happening. What a genius idea. If only we could program that shit. I'd watch it......as long as the women were able to ban certain dream topics because I've had more than one sex dream about my husband lately. That first trimester can turn a NUN into a raving slut I tell ya.

Morning sickness my ass.

Holeeeee. That's all I have to say right now. I've been sick for a week straight. It's as if the two little blue lines appearing on the stick that I reluctantly pee'd on gave my body permission to change at the drop of a hat. I'M SO SICK. I can't eat ANYTHING that tastes remotely the same as it did a week ago. The mere thought of meat makes me want to crawl up in a ball and die. My family is wondering what's for dinner and I say, UM........crackers?

I had morning sickness with the first. I remember having a little nausea and food aversions for a little while in the beginning. I don't remember waking up and wanting roll over and stay in bed until the dreaded first 12 weeks are over because getting up meant trying to force down something, anything with more than 5 calories and gulping down the retched prenatal vitamin. I have to eat the food to take the vitamin because taking the vitamin alone makes me sick, if I eat the food to take the vitamin, I'm still sick. I CAN'T WIN.

I love babies and thank the Lord for giving me this wonderful gift. I promise to cherish it with all my heart and soul and raise him/her with all that I have to offer. BUT, PLEASE MAKE THE MORNING, NOON AND NIGHT SICKNESS GO AWAY.

I'll make you an offer, if this sickness means that for the last 5 months of my pregnancy I won't need to get an economy size bottle of tums every week, then I'll gladly trade.

Anyway, this is my life right now. I haven't written because I can't sit in one place for long unless I'm horizontal and NO......it's not because I'm anxiously awaiting to please my man. Right about now he's wishing he wasn't such a fertile stud. If he ever gets laid again without 40 condoms on he'll be a lucky man.

Expansion

in progress over here. I'm having a baby!!! YAY!!!

I hope and pray that you're growing safely and healthily in there little one. Hurry up so Mommy can meet you and kiss your little cheeks and tiny fingers. I love you already.

Time flutterbies.....

Six is the new number now. This is the number of years that have passed since giving birth to my angel. We have gone from stolen, quiet moments a mother has with her newborn baby to wet kisses and big tears, first steps, words, i love you's. Potty training, curly ques and tiny teeth that make the cutest little crunches. Tantrums, hugs and kisses. Bath after bath after bath and now my baby, my sparkling wonder has turned six. No longer the chubby legged and pudgy cheeked little munchkin that I've so feverishly raised for the past six years. She is now a young girl, curious and eager to learn. D-D-D-Dog, dog starts with d, right Mom?

I love this girl. Infinatly, passionatly and whole heartedly love this girl. Every new discovery, every wonderous moment of her life. I bask in her potential and drink in as much of her as I possibly can.

I am petrified that my mothering will not be good enough to give her the roots and wings I so desparately want to bestow upon her. Such a huge responsibility has been placed upon my shoulders.

But....without her.....life would be so black and white. Her presence has brought new colors to into my world, a hope is restored and a new circle has been bonded and bound forever by her sweet little face. I love You My Sweet.

Thank you Daddy, for giving her to me. I am forever in your debt, as you are mine. Together, we have made something great and together we will see this to the end.....I love You Too My Sweet!!