If I could make just a few requests....

I don't want to seem selfish or ungrateful for my beautiful babe screaming bloody murder in the next room, but would it be horrible if I were to wish for one that was quieter this time 'round. One that didn't wail from morning to...well..morning.

Could this new baby have an easier time with teething perhaps?

And maybe this one won't walk at 10 months. Let's shoot for say, 13 months. Just old enough but not so old that I would worry.

I would also like to put in for a mild, even tempered baby. One that cried or talked even for food, diaper or sleep would be great.

Also one that eats whatever I put in front of him or her without much fuss. Would it be too brazen to ask for one that slept through the night at around 3 months, breastfeeding and all? Lets shoot for a 3 hour feeding schedule by day with little to no puke in the face afterward and 5 solid sleeping hours at night, if you could manage 10 straight hours I wouldn't argue.

Since I'm asking, one that was potty trained, never sick and talking in complete, polite sentences at birth would be fantastic. If they had a job that would be okay, too. Rent money would help cover the cost of booze that I will need to consume once this child is off the boob. A trust funder would be ideal if you could.

Reaching, reaching, reaching for the stars here, I know. But after the last two years, I'm entitled to a few requests. Any or all that can be filled would be much appreciated.

P.S. Please make my husband lactate this time.