Spring is on the way.

On one hand winter came and went so fast, on the other it lingered like the stench of a burned bag of popcorn. Hard to believe 4 months have passed since we introduced the little on into our family. Change is happening so fast in this house I'm lucky to keep my head on straight. The babe, of course, is the focus of all this change. S contributes her fair share since she will soon be blossoming into a tween over the next couple of birthdays. OH MY!! As I watch Em sprout into a playful toddler, her older sister will be soaring into puberty. I can almost see the next 4 years flashing before my eyes right now. Ugh...then I'll be in the second half of my thirties. I hope the clock slows down a little bit. I could have lived nearly half my life by now ya know. Not that I know my fate or when I am slated to pass from this grand planet, but 31 x 2 = 62....you just never know. I wish I had known how precious and fleeting time really is while I was younger.

My Mom and Dee were visiting this past weekend. WOW. A year does a lot to a person her age. She'll celebrate 79 years on her next birthday. She reminds me of a tiny little bird now (funny since her name is Bertie Bird..hahaha,ok that was bad), her face is smaller, her body shrinking, her mind isn't so bad, but there wasn't a day here that she actually remembered where my bedroom was. I chuckled as she headed towards the garage to head off to bed each night, but truth be told it's sad what happens to people as they age. Some are able to keep their dignity well into their golden years, but eventually we all end up pissing ourselves and forgetting our children's names at one point.

Dee looks good, though. I'm really grateful she beat her cancer. She is so lucky to have her voice in tact. It's also because of her that I celebrate an entire year smoke free tomorrow. Not.One.Single.Puff. Oh I've contemplated the thought, dreamed of smoking on several occasions but have otherwise remained strong. For the first time in 15 years I made it an entire year.

I'm still bf'ing. Not entirely by choice mind you. I thought I would be able to wean sometime between 3 and 6 months but that isn't going to happen. And I'm okay with that. I've told myself to get ready for the long haul and that's what the plan is. I've had several failed attempts with formula but have started solids recently and have to brag about our great success. Actually, I didn't have a lot to do with it. Em is just ready for more. She hesitated with cereal a bit, but now that fruit is in the picture she is all about her yum yums. Now the wheels are set into motion and I'll let her be my guide. She's hungry and I'm tired of bf'ing 15 times a day. It's time for us to take the next step.

S's bday party is tomorrow. I have a 7 year old. That doesn't seem possible to me. My growth as a wife and mother happened simultaneously with her growth into a young girl. How things have changed since becoming pregnant with her. I always felt like she was my gift, my wake up call so to speak, telling me that my life is on the right course and if I didn't start following it I would lose it. And quick. I also felt like she was my chance to relive my little years in a different way. To give her the love and chance at real emotional growth that I never had. I felt that she was meant for me, another sensitive little Pisces girl to nurture and protect from all the bad in the world. She is the mini version of me right down to the cow lick on the right side of her bangs. I am who I am right now because of that little girl and she never ceases to teach me lessons on being a good person. She's my reason to smile every single day.

Yes, Spring is on the way. Daylight savings goes into effect this weekend...much earlier than normal. I'm not looking forward to the dark mornings but the light at the end of the day is always a blessing. Soon I will have daffodils, tulips, crocus and hyacinth sprouting through the cold earth reminding me that life evolves and chances at new beginnings are possible with every horizon. Happy Spring!